Don't

Don't try to pinch me on Saint Patrick's Day for not wearing green.

Don't tell me you finished cleaning your room when all you did was pile your blankets on your bed.

Don't ask me a question and then argue with me about the answer.

Don't pet my hair like I'm a dog.

Don't go to a horror movie and spend the whole movie muttering-just loud enough for the person in front of you to hear- "oh no" "Oh no" "OH NO" "They shouldn't be doing that."  "They're going to get caught"  "I told you" or the best: "We should have gone to see the movie about the horse".  Yeah, you SHOULD have gone to the horse movie.

Don't "Reply All".

Don't offer to switch shifts with me, then show up late.

Don't try to fake a Kentucky accent when you're from upstate New York.

Don't try to fake any sort of British accent while you're at it.

Don't ask me about my weekend.

Community

Community is the best thing that nobody is watching on television. I know people are watching it because the internet is full of people shouting "Six seasons and a movie!", but I don't personally know anyone who watches it.  I try to convince anyone who is unfortunate enough to drift into my sphere of influence, but maybe the way I describe it makes it sound off-puttingly weird.

It's not that weird, really.  Ok, maybe the Dean is a little weird.  And we won't talk about Chang.  Or Pierce's dad's elephant ivory toupee.  Or Baby Boomer Santa.  Ok, so it can be weird if you don't know what's going on. 

The second half of this (the 3rd) season is cranking up the drama (but it's still hilarious).  Troy and Abed -who (with apologies to  Joel McHale and his pecs) are the soul of this show -are experiencing growing pains in their friendship.  The last 2 weeks I have ended the episode with "NOooooooooooooo". 

Anyway, just cuz I can, here's a clip of Abed as a vampire (you'll have to sit through the first minute and a half for the payoff).

Baking

I like to bake mostly because I like to eat what I bake. So here's a recipe for Chocolate Chocolate Chip cookies. The last time I made these I had to make them in batches, so while I had a sheet in the oven baking I was blindly shoveling cooling cookies into my mouth. These are best 5 minutes out of the oven, but are great up to 3 days later if you store them in an air-tight container.

About Me

It's April 1st.  So time for my first A to Z Challenge post.  To kick this off right, cue Flailing Kermit Arms:

So for A I'm going to do a short about me post.

So this here a few things that describe me, or at least the me that exists today.  I might be a different person tomorrow.

1. I have 4 pets: 1 son and 3 cats.
2. Signature phrase: "I hate people". Sometimes I try to not be so misanthropic, but then someone pisses me off with just absolute what-the-fuckery and I remember why I hate people.
3. Point #2 comes up A LOT in my job (I work in a call center).
4. Google is my best friend.  How I ever found ANYTHING before Google was invented I don't know. 
5. I can't stop listening to "Sexy and I Know It" by LMFAO (wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, Yeah!)
6. I have a terrible memory and my brother is always reminding me of things I've said or done.  I usually argue with him for a while before admitting that it sounds like something I would do.  He could tell me that I killed a guy in '96, chopped up the body and dumped the pieces in the Kalamozoo river, and with enough insistence from him, I'd probably confess.
7. I am a little too excited about the A to Z Challenge considering I have no theme and no ideas past the letter H.  My 10th post might just be the letter I repeated 50 times.

So here I am.  Come see me tomorrow.  I can assure you there will be absolutely no attempts at comedy for B.

The Versatile Blogger Award

Loopyloo over at My Baffling Brain and Ermie at Just Ermie both nominated me for the Versatile Blogger Award.  So excited about this.  There are some rules here, so let me just get those copied and pasted...

1. Nominate 15 others for the award and inform them with a comment on each of their blogs.

2. Create a post for the Versatile Blogger Award.

3. In the same post, thank the blogger who nominated you in a post with a link back to their blog.

4. In the same post, share 7 completely random pieces of information about yourself.

5. In the same post, include this set of rules.

I'm sorry, but I don't have 15 people to nominate.  I'm just starting to take this blogging thing seriously so I'll nominate who I can.  Plus, this award has been going around and I keep bumping into sites that already have it.

So some stuff about me:

1. My real name is Jennifer.  Once, a million years ago, a guy I was chatting with thought he was being smart by asking "Hey, can I call you Jen?" "Sure" "How about Jenny" "No" "I think I'll call you Nifer" "I don't effing care, just stop talking to me"  But it stuck in my head so that's that.
2. I am a veteran.  I served for 4 years in the US Army.  Soldiering was not my calling.
3. I believe the Ninth Doctor is the BEST Doctor.  Don't even try to argue with me on that.
4. My favorite seasons -in order of Greatest to Worst: Winter, Spring, Fall, Summer.  Summer used to be #2, back when I could spend a whole summer in a lake and/or wandering around the neighborhood in a bathing suit for 6 weeks straight, but that's really not acceptable after the age of 10.  Now I 'm one of those people who complains about how hot it is when the temps hit 85.  Don't get me started on humidity.
5. Between the ages of 6 and 22-ish I was terrified of zombies.  Like, lay in bed at night, completely still, trying not to breath so they don't get me (because for some reason the were UNDER the bed or just outside my window) terrified.  Now I love them.
6. I went through the five stages of grief over the series finale of Lost.
7. I am totally convinced that I will win the lottery some day even though I can't even match the Power Ball on any of my tickets.

Ok, so my nominees are:

Absconditus Creations I like the drawings on this site.  They kind of make me think of some of Neil Gaimans books, like Coraline or The Grave Yard Book.
  
Marissa Yasmine at 6 for my day.  She describes her days in 6 word sentences, among other randomness (yay randomness).

Eliza Wynn at Ellie's Couch.  This very motivated individual has entered three (that's 3) blogs into the A to Z Challenge.  You can visit the others at Ellie's Blank Book and Help Michigan Pets.